Coaching
Process
For whom
While almost everybody can benefit from some elements of coaching, from my experience this method works best for adults, experienced individuals who have acquired considerable intellectual resources and abilities but for a number of reasons do not have full awareness or access to these resources. There are multiple reasons for this – predominantly stress, long-imprinted, self-limiting beliefs or emotional traumas that impact confidence and effectiveness. A common challenge is also the lack of a mental ‘latticework’ – a tool to organize information and knowledge into a coherent, efficient learning system. In coaching though, all of these blocking or limiting factors are considered temporary and changeable.
I consider coaching a value management approach and I see my clients as mental entrepreneurs – people who want to reorganize their mind resources from a state of lower value to a state of higher value and continue developing them. What is necessary is a curiosity to question the status quo and readiness to change, which in practice means you have to be ready to invest intellectual and physical effort but also ready to accept the outcomes of the change – in their full spectrum.
It’s a process
Coaching sessions are the time when you initiate the change. You create a resourceful state, build future visions and strategies full of positive emotions, motivation and commitment. You will use these elements as powerful anchors which will fuel the conscious and analytic part of your brain to plan tangible actions to execute on these strategies. A lot of that happens in coaching sessions. But what is more important is what happens in between sessions – that is your own work – in real life, in interactions with real people, exchanging real resources. This is when change really happens and this process takes time.
There is more work between sessions than in the session.
In every session, we discuss the progress made since the last meeting and what conclusions can be derived from what happened. These learnings are applied to your experience and work to improve consecutive iterations of imagining, planning and execution.
Auto-telic values
There are two parallel developments happening during coaching.
On one level you will work on your specific challenges and goals with a view to implement changes through a series of planned actions. That is a very visible and tangible outcome of coaching. What is less visible but equally, and in the longer term more important, is growing more fundamental, intrapersonal abilities that over time will make you more capable, self-reliant, and independent. This process is facilitated by the values and behaviors offered by the coach during sessions. The most important ones are acceptance of a client’s approaches, goals and choices, respect for a client’s identity and mission, trust in a client’s abilities to introduce desired change and the partnership between the client and the coach. These behaviors applied consistently stimulate the growth of corresponding auto-telic values in you as a client. Some of the most important ones are self-awareness, which is key for reflection and learning; effectiveness which leads to optimized actions and self of agency; responsibility in accepting positive and negative consequences of your action and finally, growing integrity between beliefs and actions that brings clarity and peace of mind.
Lasting change
Lasting change happens as a result of achieving tangible short- to medium-term outcomes and a parallel build-up of auto-telic values. The period when this lasting change begins is subtle but visible.
How I notice this with my clients is that over time they want to spend less and less time on operational issues because they are fully capable and motivated to resolve them by themselves. They prefer to spend a greater amount of time on more strategic matters, mastering their intellectual and emotional capabilities in order to better understand the world around them, make smarter decisions and better interact with people and organizations. They move from a position of reactive problem-solving to proactive shaping of their environment that enables efficiency, balance, and happiness.
Our relationships often develop towards a more intellectual partnership where we jointly work, challenge each other and grow.
